I am so alone

There lying still underneath

the cloak of my

egocentric exterior

lies a lonely soul

seeking companionship

in a world that values

idols and false images.

 

I am so alone.

 

I wait for rebirth

for new beginnings

but yet I fear

that my time has past

in a time of my life

where I slowly slip

into the narrow channel

of a deepening age.

 

I am so alone.

 

I thought of my youth

just the other day

and all I took for granted

and let slip by

as I mourn the passing

of lost opportunities

and chances

of moments of bliss

and deeply passionate encounters.

 

I am so alone.

 

I wait for the unexpected spark

lit unknowingly in the middle of a

deep and dark night

when an ember turns into a flame

like a match sets a fire

to something that has been concealed for far too long.

 

I am so alone.

 

I have travelled far.

I have travelled far.

Into deep, distant crevices.

Crevices that mark the geography of my soul.

 

I have travelled far.

There is no turning back now.

I must continue.

I must continue forward into the fog and the darkness.

 

I have travelled far.

But, yet, I am frightened.

I am so frightened.

Of the distance ahead of me and the deep unknowns that lurk.

 

I have travelled far.

To come here.

Right here.

Right now.

 

Pushing toward the peak.

Driven by desire.

Pulled by longing.

 

I have travelled far.

 

Take my hand

and travel with me.

 

I can’t do it alone.

I have travelled far.

 

I need you.

 

Do you really have it all?

You have it all.

But what do you have?

 

You have the house.

You have the car.

You have the life.

 

But, do you really have it at all?

 

Do you have love?

In your heart

and

in your soul?

 

You have it all.

But what do you have?

 

You have the competence.

You have the respect of many.

You have self-assurance and confidence.

 

But, do your really have it all?

 

Do you have love?

The one thing that you heart beats for?

The one thing that your soul longs for?

No matter where you are

or who you are

or what you are

if you don’t have love

then you are the

poorest

of the

poor.

 

Do you have what

your

heart

so deeply

hungers for?

 

Do you really have it all?

 

 

 

 

I love you, I love you, I love you

I love you, I love you, I love you.

There is no explanation for that.

No desire to know more about

the how or the

why.

 

I just do.

 

I love you, I love you, I love you.

I need not explain why you

and

I

are destined to be here.

It is not our calling

to explain the intricacies

of

what we know not.

 

We just are.

 

I love you, I love you, I love you.

There is no other place

that we belong

than in our secret place.

Only our souls can answer why.

Otherwise we risk

the destruction of our

mysterious

and

lyrical

presence.

 

We are called

only to trust that knowing.

 

I love you, I love you, I love you.

 

That is enough.

 

 

 

I fight you, I fight you.

I fight you, I fight you…

you lurk in deep corners.

You are a demon

until I am afraid no more

and then

I have

slain you.

 

I fight you, I fight you…

in a battle that is only seen

from within.

You are a demon

until I wrestle no more

and then

when we cease

I have found

my soul.

 

I fight you, I fight you…

until we fight no more.

I cast aside my fears,

and I accept the

loss and change.

 

And, instead we become friends,

and you bless me, and bless me

with

the gifts of

healing and freedom.

 

You haunt me no more.

 

What did I really see today?

What did I really see today?

 

I saw a lonely man seeking company.

I saw an immigrant family huddled in a car waiting.

I saw an older couple in the twilight of their life.

I saw grandparents weeping silently for the loss of their grandson.

I saw roadside memorials marking those who have past and those that remain.

I saw a man reach out to gently touch the hand of the woman he loves.

I saw a beautiful radiant sky caressing a cold earth.

 

What did I really see today?

I saw the face of God in every place that I looked.

I saw heaven on Earth.

 

My heart leapt at each and every story

I envision those faces held.

 

My heart leapt at each and every story

my soul felt as it reached out into the beyond.

 

My heart leapt at each and every story

as I softly blessed them in their travels.

 

What did I really see today?

 

I realized for one moment today that my heart hung empty.  Not for them but for me.  In a world that cares little for each other, I care so much for the unknown that is karmically exhausts me.  I love beyond reason everyone and everything.  I pray that someone silently sees me, and their heart leaps for my tired and weary soul.  I pray…

I am not your possession​

I am not your possession.

You cannot own me.

I am not a book, a company, an idea, or even money.

I am not yours to have.

 

Look away with that eye of greed.

Glance it elsewhere

at someone or something

that glances back.

You cannot look me in the eye.

 

Let me be

in my innocence of desire.

You seek

to poison and impoverish me.

 

I am not your possession.

You cannot own me.

I am not a car, a boat, a place, or even a house.

I am not yours to have.

 

There, over there.

The one that dares

to look me in the eye.

To peer deep

and sees

my secret beauty

hidden deep beneath.

 

Let me be

with truth, courage, and expectation.

To see me in true light.

Who seeks

to know my nature, destiny,

and my inborn divinity.

 

Full of invitation, possibility, and depth.

 

But, not you.  No, not you.

 

I am not your possession.