I remember…

I remember.

I remember that day.

So vividly as if it were yesterday.

Seared on my soul, like a wild brush fire.

 

I remember.

Exactly what happened step-by-step.

Moment by moment.

As if those moments were only yesterday.

 

I remember.

The unbelief.

The shock.

The darkness.

 

I remember not knowing what to do.

 

Shaking and trembling.

 

I remember.

The tears, the screams.

The cars sitting in traffic.

Waiting for their turn at the lights

all the while, I felt like my life had just ended.

 

I was in distress, my ship was sinking

I was drowning

but yet no one heard my mayday call.

 

I remember.

It was the end of a dream.

It was the end of my life.

It would change the very meaning of who I was.

 

I remember begging and pleading with God.

Saying, “No” this can’t be true, this can’t be possible.

How could this be happening.

Please say this is NOT happening.

 

I remember…

in one brief moment,

 

There went my hopes and my dreams.

There went all I had ever wanted in this life.

And all for no reason. All without cause. All without sense.

And in its place, nothingness.

 

I remember that I could not see beyond,

to what today might hold.

That in that pain, something more and greater would arise.

Something more beautiful than had been there before.

 

I remember death that day.

But, today, I see new beginnings.

A new life.

 

I remember feeling resentful, angry, and intensely lonely.

I remember those feelings.

Feelings as if they were just felt a moment before.

 

Until now, here I stand, having lived through each moment,

since that moment,

standing before you with grace and fully alive.

 

Emerging from the dark side of the soul.

 

Now, I know…

I have become what I have meant to be in this world

because of this moment.

Do you really have it all?

You have it all.

But what do you have?

 

You have the house.

You have the car.

You have the life.

 

But, do you really have it at all?

 

Do you have love?

In your heart

and

in your soul?

 

You have it all.

But what do you have?

 

You have the competence.

You have the respect of many.

You have self-assurance and confidence.

 

But, do your really have it all?

 

Do you have love?

The one thing that you heart beats for?

The one thing that your soul longs for?

No matter where you are

or who you are

or what you are

if you don’t have love

then you are the

poorest

of the

poor.

 

Do you have what

your

heart

so deeply

hungers for?

 

Do you really have it all?

 

 

 

 

I am not your possession​

I am not your possession.

You cannot own me.

I am not a book, a company, an idea, or even money.

I am not yours to have.

 

Look away with that eye of greed.

Glance it elsewhere

at someone or something

that glances back.

You cannot look me in the eye.

 

Let me be

in my innocence of desire.

You seek

to poison and impoverish me.

 

I am not your possession.

You cannot own me.

I am not a car, a boat, a place, or even a house.

I am not yours to have.

 

There, over there.

The one that dares

to look me in the eye.

To peer deep

and sees

my secret beauty

hidden deep beneath.

 

Let me be

with truth, courage, and expectation.

To see me in true light.

Who seeks

to know my nature, destiny,

and my inborn divinity.

 

Full of invitation, possibility, and depth.

 

But, not you.  No, not you.

 

I am not your possession.

 

 

The wound of mortality

You carry it.

I carry it.

We all carry it.

Deep in our heart

lie the wound of

mortality.

 

We try

to cover it with a blanket of skin,

but

no matter how much we try,

no wound is ever silent.

 

Beyond that fair exterior,

I feel the tremble

of your wound,

just as you feel the

tremble of mine.

 

You carry it.

I carry it.

We all carry it.

Deep in our heart

lie the wound of

mortality.

 

For one brief moment,

the sacred enters in

knowing exactly where our pain lay.

 

And, in that moment,

the divine light heals

your soul,

my soul,

as it gently weeps.

 

You carry it.

I carry it.

We all carry it.

Deep in our heart

lie the wound of

mortality.

 

For each of us,

the voice is different,

from a time when we were

damaged

or

wronged.

It evades time

and

analysis.

 

Only with waiting,

as with all great arrivals

in the soul,

healing comes from a place

we never predicted nor

anticipated.

 

Silently waiting for its time.

 

As your soul gently weeps,

as my soul gently weeps,

no wound ever remains silent.

A celebration.

I celebrate you.

You celebrate me.

I celebrate you.

 

My heart celebrates all that is you.

Your heart celebrates all that is me.

We celebrate each other.

 

Take me

and

dance

and sing.

 

Take me

and

lift

my

soul

heavenward.

 

Lift me high, high, high

to where

the lovely light

of the eternal will

enrapture me.

 

I celebrate you.

You celebrate me.

I celebrate you.

 

I recognize you.

You delight me.

You recognize me

I delight you.

 

Take me

and let’s

dance and sing

in this moment

of actuality

down, down, down

nourishing

the deep dark

recesses of my soul.

 

I celebrate you.

You celebrate me.

I celebrate you.

 

My heart celebrates all that is you.

Your heart celebrates all that is me.

We celebrate each other.

 

A blessing, a gift.

My heart is content.

I lie still in gratitude.

 

Together, we have painted a picture

of belonging.

 

Celebrate!

 

A Nomadic Soul.

Deep inside lies a nomadic soul.

You see one facade.

The one for the world to consume.

To laugh, and joke, and cajole.

 

Deep inside lies a nomadic soul.

What is visible is not what lies deeply hidden.

Conformity in a world that demands uniformity.

To think, and to feel, and to be the same.

 

Deep inside lies a nomadic soul.

What is visible remains consistent.

It is only what you want to see.

To be the same at work, the same at home, the same with friends.

 

Deep inside lies a nomadic soul.

Longing for inner voyages that no one would ever guess.

Only my heart knows where it must go.

To meet its longing, to feel its beat, to be different.

 

Deep inside lies a nomadic soul.

Desperately seeking to answer an ancient call.

Full of creativity and imagination.

To dream, to bless, to be called.

 

Deep inside lies a nomadic soul.

Reaching out into the distance my soul aches

to unite with whatever or whomsoever

its desire it evokes.

Deep inside lies a nomadic soul.

Distant and apart from who I am outwardly

feeling the separation from the absence

of light and luminosity missing.

 

 

While I live in this world

of social this and social that,

my heart is in exile.

Wildly misunderstood

in a world that seeks not to understand.

 

Deep down …

lies an old nomadic soul.

 

 

I am anxious, I am scared.

I am anxious, I am scared.

My soul trembles deep within, my confidence escapes.

 

I am anxious, I am scared.

I know not what lies ahead of me, only behind.

 

I am anxious, I am scared.

I live in an interim period of what is between.

 

I am anxious, I am scared.

I feel no humor or sense of irony about me.

 

I am anxious, I am scared.

I wait each day for a coming liberation to free me.

 

I am anxious, I am scared.

One day soon, I will stop the punishment and smile.