Finding comfort

I know what binging will do and the feelings that it will cause.  Intense shame, guilt and anger at myself for doing it.

Yet, even though I do know this, I still cannot stop from turning to food.  I find comfort in binging.  It helps me to stuff my emotions and to place myself in a “coma” not having to deal with what is at hand or what I am feeling.

This behavior does indeed cause me misery.

As I sit here today, I feel bloated and miserable after a week long binge last week.  I am in remorse as I had been abstinent for quite a while and had lost some weight through the process.

I start anew with the hope that this is week number one of complete abstinence as I do not like how being the food makes me feel not only about myself, but, about life.

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